CASE STUDY # 7 (pursuant to case study # 6 pursuant to case study # 5 pursuant to case # 4 pursuant to case # 3 pursuant to case # 2 pursuant to case # 1: The Donnie Diaries: an ode to Ipecac)
Warning: samo samo: “following rant may contain extremely offensive and disturbing images characterized by logorrhea, hebephrenia and dissociation, contrasted by excessive ASSOCIATION AND digression containing extreme use of juvenile rhyme, homophones, paronomasia, and portmanteau” blah blah blah… with appropriate caveats along the way…
That picture you’re looking at? That’s Augie’s caricature of me in his Confessions of St. Augustine (he was the narrator). Typical teenage rebel high on who knows what all the while not realizing I was just as high on I do know what (Let’s Stop Drugs – our ironic code acronym of the day). Not a very flattering picture of me, but he certainly nailed that brown nosing man of the cloth and Macbeth’s three witches so apropos for the start of his story.
Anyway, back to today, I’ll get back to him in a minute, because I can’t think of a more appropriate blog in light of recent events, insane utterances and outrageous performances from those I mentioned before in Trumplandia V: Trump, White, Bondi, Graham, Hegseth, Noem and let’s not forget her cross-dressing husband, etc etc etc… a satirist’s dream and for a minute there I thought the Walter Reed rumors might have augured the end of all my future material. Because I want him to live and suffer the full humiliation he so richly deserves.
Because you can’t make this stuff up. Every minute is a study in insanity, oxymorons and double-talk. Alice in Wonderland stuff. We’re going to unconditionally demand conditional surrender if they don’t comply with what could never happen unless it happened before it didn’t happen UNLESS it did… happen. Whatever it was that was suppose to happen. On THAT you can be sure! Unless you aren’t. TWENTY FOUR HOURS! Starting next week! Unless. They decide to resist next month, by tomorrow!
And now that I’ve clarified what our goals are I plan to clarify my concepts of a plan which I’ve been planning to clarify a plan in the conceptual stages perfectly clear in the plan of clarification planned by clarifying the plan.
And if that doesn’t do it, we’ll increase the aforementioned tenfold (aforementioned? Did I mention that before?)
“Jim Blaine and His Grandfather’s Ram” is a short story by Mark Twain I used to try to read to my English class as an example of hopeless digression but I could never get through it without cracking up. So now when I hear Trump, that’s what I think of, with a little bit of Professor Cory and Al Kelly, Sid Caesar, Dunwoody Fincher, all masters of double-talk, a skill I developed in my college days when I was supposed to be reading my Shakespeare I was dreaming up the next prank or skit or impersonation and was always thrilled when a new comedian came on the scene: Lenny Bruce, Shelley Berman, Mort Sahl, these guys were my heroes and occasional role models short of imitation since true comedy has to be original. All the comedians, satirists, and wits throughout history I would study and if that were a major like English which I did major in I’d’ve spent more time studying than creating I suppose pre-Monty Python National Lampoon SNL Robin Williams stuff so don’t croak on me Donnie! I don’t want to end up like Vaughn Meader who had JFK down and made a fortune until… no Donnie, YOU GOTTA LIVE! You’re my bread and butter. An endless goldmine of material. No one in filmed history comes as close to you as the ultimate buffoon. Idi Amin? Gaddafi? Bokassa? Mussolini? Naw. All tame by comparison. You’re Shakespearean. Falstaff (fat, vain, cowardly)? Cloten (pretentious and dimwitted)? Dogberry (bumbling, malapropism-prone)? No, you’re in a league all your own. The word Trump I predict will replace buffoon, fool, all the words heretofore that epitomized the worst in man, the most ridiculous: buffoon extraordinaire.
If we survive that long.
Now I say Shakespearean because Shakespeare knew how to appeal to the rabble and if you’ve been to the Globe the whole center is standing room only, specifically for the rabble (if you’ve seen Hamnet) and that’s Trump. Reach the rabble only to get their votes and then exploit them once ya got’m. All those billions he was going to use for you? Forgedaboudit! As Napoleon said, when in political trouble (Epstein Files), start a war (threaten Greenland? No, that didn’t work. Venezuela? Hardly. Iran? So far, so good.).
Or is it? Could backfire.
Unless.
I have a concept of a concept that I plan to conceive and have already secured it with Iran’s leadership and the talks are guaranteed to secure our goals they promised and you can quote me on that!
Which is why no one does because they don’t know what the hell he’s talking about.
So I’ve made it my mission to make sense out’ve nonsense. How did he get this far? Are the American people really that stupid? Paula White waves her hand and half her congregation fall backwards like God touched them “slain in the Spirit” is what they call it meanwhile she’s asking them to cough up all their money for her billion dollar ministry because Trump is God’s chosen which at this stage I don’t doubt – but not to save us but to destroy us! For being so craven and demented as to follow the closet thing to the Antichrist AND I’M AN ATHEIST!
Which is maybe why.
Self-preservation. Because when you have the heir apparents of the once respected “Christian” leaders duped by pure evil, what good are they? Blind leading the blind.
Interesting: Dante had the Pope in the lowest level of Hell meanwhile Michaelangelo did the same with his painting on the Sistine Chapel no less and America’s holding out hope for this yoyo? Who just put out an AI of himself as CHRIST?!
Which brings me back to Augie and his best. His take down of Calvinism and predestination. Which I won’t get into. Way too long and way over my head, but he attacks the hypocrites of his day (the intellectual Christian elite for the most part – where he argues that while atheism insults God by giving Him NO credit for His ORIGINAL creation – Calvinism insults God by giving Him TOTAL credit for His FALLEN creation) albeit from a believer’s point of view all of which convinces me there are some out there who aren’t duped by this huckster.
Yeah, even Coulter calls him that and she’s as crazy as they come. And MARGE! Talk about a true believer. Or opportunist? Since she knows where the wind is blowing.
Which is what HE is. All wind.
And what could be more bizarre than our Commander in Chief spewing his usual venom before all those poor innocent little kids next to the Easter Bunny? A scene right out of The Producers: “Spring for Hitler and Germany!”
And oh yeah, that threat he was going to wipe Iran off the face of the map by 8:00 PM EST Tuesday April 7th if they didn’t concede? The usual. Two week extension. Where have we heard that before?
Typical Trump. Scrambled eggs and Trump telling us he never broke a yoke.
And as for so many of his heretofore faithful followers: Green, Carlson, Kelly, Rogan, Coulter, etc etc etc?
Et tu Brute?
Dr. Phineas T. Redwell